Chocolate Sundaes is live this Sunday!

joke bank - Animal Jokes

Q: How do you know that carrots are good for your eyes
A: You never see a rabbit wears glasses.

Anonymous

A man goes to a pet shop and buys a talking parrot. He takes the parrot home and tries to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but instead, the parrot just swears at him. After a few hours of trying to teach the bird, the man finally says, "If you don't stop swearing, I'm going to put you in the freezer as punishment." The parrot continues, so finally the man puts the bird in the freezer. About an hour later, the parrot asks the man to please open the door. As the man takes the shivering bird out of the freezer, it says, "I promise to never swear again. Just tell me what that turkey did!"

Alphabeat

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moo!

Anonymous

Why do hummingbirds hum? Because they don't know the words.

typical joker

Q: What's a bunny's favorite restaurant? A: IHOP.

michael

What did the dog say to the hot dog bun? "Are you pure bred?"

tigerfire

Q: What do bees comb their hair with?
A: A honey comb!

Anonymous

I went to a hot dog stand with my pet snake. I said," May I please have a hot dog for my snake?" The waitress replied, "I'm sorry, but we're all out of buns." I said, "My anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns, hun!"

Plastereds...

Hickory Dickory Dock. Two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one and the other got away with minor injuries.

Mark My Words

Q: Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?
A: Because if it had four, it would be chicken sedan.

TheLaughFa...

A farmer is walking with a prospective buyer when they see a beautiful pig in the yard, except it has a wooden leg. The buyer asks, "Why the wooden leg?" The farmer replies, "That pig is so smart, I let it drive the kids to school."
"Great, but why the wooden leg?"
"The pig is so smart it has a degree in horticulture and philosophy."
"Amazing! But why the bloody wooden leg?"
"Well when you have a pig that smart you don't eat it all at once!"

Crown Footy

Q: Why did the man name his dogs Rolex and Timex?
A: Because they were watch dogs.

marty