joke bank - Animal Jokes

Q: What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A: A thesaurus.

Silenxio M...

Q: Why shouldn't you have a gay monkey and a gay squirrel in the same tree?
A: Because the monkey will go bananas over the squirrel's nuts.

TheLaughFa...

Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and no hind legs?
A: Sparky.

Anonymous

Q. What's a shark's favorite sandwich?
A. Peanut butter and jellyfish!

hello_the_...

Q: How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
A: Put it in the microwave until it's Bill Withers.

iwe

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "If you can make that horse over there laugh, you can get free drinks for the rest of the night." The man walks over, says something to the horse, it laughs, and he walks back over to the bar to collect his free drinks. The next night, the man goes back to the bar and the bartender asks the man if he can make the horse cry. The man walks over, does something to the horse, and it starts to cry. The bartender asks, "How did you make it cry?" The man replies, "Well, to make the horse laugh last night I told it I had a bigger dick and to make it cry tonight I showed it."

Anonymous

Q: Where do bees go to the toilet?
A: The BP station.

Anonymous

A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking around."

TheLaughFa...

Just had a dangerous mole removed from the end of my penis. Definitely won't be shagging one of those again.

Robin Bowen

Q. What do you call a paralyzed goat?

A. Billy Idle

RainMan500

Q: What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?
A: "Dam."

ink123

A baby snake asked it's mom, "Mommy are we poisonous?" The mother snake responded, "Yes honey, but why do you want to know?" The baby snake responded, "Because I just bit myself..."

nimabeni