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joke bank - Animal Jokes

A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking around."

TheLaughFa...

Q: What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?
A: "Dam."

ink123

A baby snake asked it's mom, "Mommy are we poisonous?" The mother snake responded, "Yes honey, but why do you want to know?" The baby snake responded, "Because I just bit myself..."

nimabeni

What do you call a dog with no legs? It does not matter, it's not going to come

NENO

What did Santa call his reindeer that couldn't fly? Dinner.

amandadean526

Q: What do you call a cow with two legs?
A: Lean beef.

Anonymous

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Ell-if-I-no (Hell if I know).

Anonymous

Q. What's a shark's favorite sandwich?
A. Peanut butter and jellyfish!

hello_the_...

Q: How do birds fly?
A: They just wing it!

Willem Van...

Q: What is the difference between OJ Simpson and the Lion King?
A: The Lion King is an African lion and OJ is a lyin' African.

adonis

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "If you can make that horse over there laugh, you can get free drinks for the rest of the night." The man walks over, says something to the horse, it laughs, and he walks back over to the bar to collect his free drinks. The next night, the man goes back to the bar and the bartender asks the man if he can make the horse cry. The man walks over, does something to the horse, and it starts to cry. The bartender asks, "How did you make it cry?" The man replies, "Well, to make the horse laugh last night I told it I had a bigger dick and to make it cry tonight I showed it."

Anonymous

Q: What do elephants use for tampons?
A: Sheep.

mgrector