joke bank - Animal Jokes

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moo!

Anonymous

Why did the dog sit in the shade? Because he didn't want to be a hot dog!

karrie76

A man goes to a pet shop and buys a talking parrot. He takes the parrot home and tries to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but instead, the parrot just swears at him. After a few hours of trying to teach the bird, the man finally says, "If you don't stop swearing, I'm going to put you in the freezer as punishment." The parrot continues, so finally the man puts the bird in the freezer. About an hour later, the parrot asks the man to please open the door. As the man takes the shivering bird out of the freezer, it says, "I promise to never swear again. Just tell me what that turkey did!"

Alphabeat

Why can't Miss Piggy count to 100? Because when she gets to 69 she has a frog in her throat.

coolwatters

Q: What time is it when a elephant sits on a fence?
A: Time to fix the fence.

Anonymous

An American tourist walks out of a Mexican train station when he notices he isn't wearing his watch. A Mexican man is resting under a sombrero under a nearby tree. The American approaches the Mexican and asks, "Excuse me, do you know what time is?" The Mexican looks at the donkey, grabs its balls, and replies, "4:30." The American asks, "How do you know that?" The Mexican replies, "Well you get a handful of the donkeys balls and lift them up so you can see that clock across the street."

Gabe Neaveill

Q: Why are fish easy to weigh?
A: Because they have their own scales.

Rexx

A baby snake asked it's mom, "Mommy are we poisonous?" The mother snake responded, "Yes honey, but why do you want to know?" The baby snake responded, "Because I just bit myself..."

nimabeni

Q: How do you know that carrots are good for your eyes
A: You never see a rabbit wears glasses.

Anonymous

Q: Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?
A: Because if it had four, it would be chicken sedan.

TheLaughFa...

What is the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs think, "Humans are benevolent, they feed me and take care of me, so they must be Gods. Cats think, "Humans are benevolent, they feed me and take care of me, so I must be God."

abilioperez

Q: What do bees comb their hair with?
A: A honey comb!

Anonymous