joke bank - Animal Jokes

Q: What do you call a cow with two legs?
A: Lean beef.

Anonymous

Q: What do elephants use for tampons?
A: Sheep.

mgrector

What do you call a dog with no legs? It does not matter, it's not going to come

NENO

What did Santa call his reindeer that couldn't fly? Dinner.

amandadean526

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Ell-if-I-no (Hell if I know).

Anonymous

Q: How do birds fly?
A: They just wing it!

Willem Van...

A guy spots a sign outside a house that reads “Talking Dog for Sale.” Intrigued, he walks in. “So what have you done with your life?” he asks the dog. “I've led a very full life,” says the dog. “I lived in the Alps rescuing avalanche victims. Then I served my country in Iraq. And now I spend my days reading to the residents of a retirement home.” The guy is flabbergasted. He asks the dog’s owner, “Why on earth would you want to get rid of an incredible dog like that?” The owner says, “Because he’s a liar! He never did any of that!”

TheLaughFa...

Q: What did the mama cow say to the baby cow?
A: "It's pasture bedtime."

Lee Ann S.

A man walk into a bar and says, "Give me something to drink just no vodka." The bartender asks, "Why? That's your typical drink of choice." The man replies, "Because last night I got drunk and blew Chunks." The bartender says, "Well, it's normal to blow chunks if you drink too much. The man says, "No, Chunks is my dog."

Androgynous

Q: Why do seagulls fly over the sea? A: Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

Anonymous

Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Climb a tree and act like a nut.

Anonymous

The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Anonymous