Have you heard? Michael Jackson’s last wish was that his body be turned into Legos. So little kids can play with him. It turns out this wish hasn’t been difficult to implement, as his body was already 99% plastic.
A woman was at the pharmacy and asked, “Can I get Viagra here?” The old pharmacist replied, “Yes.” She asked, “Can I get it over the counter?” He responded, “If you give me two of them, you can.”
What happens when you stick your hand in a jar of jelly beans? The black one steals your watch.
How do you know if a guy has a high sperm count? She has to chew before she swallows.
Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?
A: The pizza dosen't scream when it's put into an oven.