joke bank - Clean Jokes

They say you can never judge a book by its cover. But it’s the only way to
judge a tribute band.


Santa, standing on a railway platform, suddenly runs and stands on the tracks.
Banta: "Santa, move out of the way! The train is arriving!"
Santa: "Haven't you heard the announcement that the train is arriving on the platform?"


A woman walks into a cafe with a stomach ache.After a while she realizes she needs to relieve herself, knowing her farts are loud, she decides to fart simultaneously with the cafe music. Every time the music gets really loud she let out a long fart. She saw that everyone in the cafe was staring at her and later realized that she was wearing headsets the whole time...


20 years I've been eating outta cereal boxes, and you gotta give it to em'. They stayed firm and refused to move with the times. I mean they know the resealable ziplock bag exists, but they've never backed down. No matter how many times the fold-in top rips or the plastic bag tears on the wrong edge, they say "No innovation, we say no!"


Q: What do you get if you cross a horse with a bee?
A: Neigh buzz


Simba was moving too slowly, so I told him to Mufasa!


A prisoner was freed from prison and yelled: I'm free, I'm free at last!" and a kid replied "So what? I'm four"

David Wils...

Boy: what's the difference between a tuna, a piano, and a pot of glue?
Girl: I don't know
Boy: you can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna
Girl: what about the pot of glue?
Boy: I knew you'd get stuck there!

Redpony ??...

What happend when the duck fell upside-down? He quacked up!


A man was in a restaurant one day and then he suddenly realized he had to pass gas! And the music was really loud in the restaurant so he let it out! But, then he realized he was listening to his iPod music


Knock Knock

Who's there?


Boo Who?

Do not cry it is only a joke


Q:what did one penny say to the other penny?
A:lets get together and make some cents!