How to be Insulting in Church: Pour water into the font and wash your hands in it. If you're really daring, take off your shoes and socks and cool your feet.
How to be Insulting in Banks: When ordering travelers checks, try to get the smallest denomination available, and then take ages signing each check in front of the cashier.
How to be Insulting on the Beach: Buy several large newspapers, and leave these lying around so that they blow all over the beach.
How to be Insulting at Christmas: Turn up the television when the carol singers arrive and turn off the lights until they go away.
How to be Insulting in Hotels: If you have to get up early, do it with the maximum amount of noise. Run a bath loudly and sing in it.