joke bank - National Jokes

A Brazilian, a Frenchman, and a Nigerian were in a plane. The pilot told them that they have to jump out of the plane when they find their country. The Brazilian jumped out when he saw the Christ the Redeemer statue. The Frenchman jumped out when he saw the Eiffel Tower. When it was the Nigerian's turn the pilot asked, "When will you jump?" The Nigerian put his hand outside the plane window. When he brought it back in, his watch was gone. He said, "Ah, we've reached my country."

Why are there no ice cubes in Poland? Because they lost the recipe.

Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Five. One to hold the light bulb and four to turn the house.

Paddy Englishman, Paddy Scotchman and Paddy Irishman come across a magic slide. The slide operator tells them when they slide down, whatever they shout out for is what they will land in at the bottom. Paddy Englishman goes first and yells "Gold!" and lands in gold. Paddy Scotsman goes next and screams "Silver!" so he lands in silver. Paddy Irishman looks down the slide and, being afraid of heights, closes his eyes and jumps, crying out "OH SH*T!"

Q: Why is North Korea not as fun as South Korea?
A: Because it has no Seoul.

Q: If you go into the toilet American and you come out of the toilet American, what are you while you're on the toilet?
A: European.

What's the difference between an Irish wake and an Irish wedding? One less drunk.

Have you heard the Mexican weather forecast? Chili today and hot tamale.

Q: Does Britain have a 4th of July?
A: Yes, and a 5th and a 6th too

I live in Bakersfield, California. At least it's not Barstow, a city that owes its existence to the fact that people traveling to Las Vegas needed a place to stop and take a sh*t. There was a toilet and they built a city around it.

Q: Do you want to know how I got out of Iraq?

A: I-ran

Two men from Dublin are walking to the annual Dublin Fair, when it starts to rain. "Patrick, put your umbrella up, it's raining." "I can't, Mick, it's got holes in it." "Holes in it? Then why did you bring it with you?" "I didn't think it would rain."