joke bank - National Jokes

Why are there no ice cubes in Poland? Because they lost the recipe.

How do Germans tie their shoes? With little knot-sies!

Why do Italians wear gold chains? So they know where to stop shaving!

Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Five. One to hold the light bulb and four to turn the house.

Paddy Englishman, Paddy Scotchman and Paddy Irishman come across a magic slide. The slide operator tells them when they slide down, whatever they shout out for is what they will land in at the bottom. Paddy Englishman goes first and yells "Gold!" and lands in gold. Paddy Scotsman goes next and screams "Silver!" so he lands in silver. Paddy Irishman looks down the slide and, being afraid of heights, closes his eyes and jumps, crying out "OH SH*T!"

Q: Why do Scottish people wear kilts? A: Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Have you heard the Mexican weather forecast? Chili today and hot tamale.

A Brazilian, a Frenchman, and a Nigerian were in a plane. The pilot told them that they have to jump out of the plane when they find their country. The Brazilian jumped out when he saw the Christ the Redeemer statue. The Frenchman jumped out when he saw the Eiffel Tower. When it was the Nigerian's turn the pilot asked, "When will you jump?" The Nigerian put his hand outside the plane window. When he brought it back in, his watch was gone. He said, "Ah, we've reached my country."

An Indian cab driver picked up a Japanese man from a hotel. Along the way, they saw a Honda motorcycle overtake the taxicab and the Japanese guy said, "Motorcycle very fast, made in Japan." Then a Toyota car overtook the taxicab and the Japanese guy said, "Car very fast, made in Japan." When they reached the destination the fare was 1500 rupees. The Japanese man thought the ride was would only cost 500 rupees. He asked the driver why the ride was so expensive. The driver said, "Meter very fast, made in India."

What's the difference between an Irish wake and an Irish wedding? One less drunk.

Q: Why were the Indians here first?
A: They had reservations.

Q: Why did Mexicans create tequila?
A: So ugly people would have a chance at having sex!