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joke bank - Popular Jokes

Yo mama so dumb she tried to make an appointment with Dr. Pepper.

David Simo...

A brunette goes into a doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." She takes her finger, presses on her elbow, and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams, and so it goes on; everywhere she touches makes her scream with pain. The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?" She says, "No, I dyed my hair. I'm naturally blonde." "I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."

A Blonde

Yo momma is so fat when she sat on an iPad she made a plasma TV.

morgan Dav...

Q: What's the problem with an Asian pet store?
A: There's always a kitchen in the back.

Anonymous

Three brothers are traveling along a road, and their car dies. They all get out of the car, and start walking to a barn that's a little ways away. When they get their, the farmer comes out of the barn, and offers them a room for one night. He says to the first one, "You can sleep with the pigs," the second guy," you can sleep with the cows", and the third guy, "I like the cut of your jib. You can sleep with my 18 daughters." The next morning, he asks everyone how they slept. The first man said, "I slept like a pig." The second man said ,"I slept like a cow." The third guy said, "I slept like a rabbit. I jumped from hole, to hole, to hole."

AminJimbo

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they laid down for the night, and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars." "What does that tell you?" Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies, and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?" Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke. "It tells me that someone has stolen our tent."

chinie

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

TheLaughFa...

Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet? Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!!

Ur2010cowvoys

Yo momma is so ugly her parents had to feed her with a slingshot.

TheLaughFa...

Yo momma is so fat she went to church with heels on and when she came back home they were flats.

Lexi Pooh

Q: Why do Chinese people have Chinese babies?
A: Because two Wongs don't make a white.

Lol

Q: Why do Chinese people have Chinese babies?
A: Because two Wongs don't make a white.

Lol