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Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?
A: "Put it on my bill."

TheLaughFactory

A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it!”

Anonymous

Late one night, a preacher was driving on a country road and had a wreck. A farmer stopped and said, "Sir, are you okay?" The preacher said, "Yes, I had the Lord riding with me." The farmer said, "Well, you better let him ride with me, because you're gonna kill him."

Anonymous

What is the difference between a Mexican and a book? A book has papers.

kblove

Your momma is so ugly she made One Direction go another direction.

Anonymous