A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
Yo mamma is so ugly when she tried to join an ugly contest they said, "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo momma is so fat that when she went to the beach a whale swam up and sang, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me."
Yo momma's so fat and old when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mother to move out of the way.
Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911?
A: She can't find the eleven.