What happens if a Jew with an erection walks face first into a wall? He breaks his nose.
Q: What's the only positive thing about living in the ghetto?
A: Pregnancy tests.
What do you call an African-American whose spouse just died? A black widow.
Two Jews walk into a bar and ask for some water. Why? Because its free.
Q: Why did only 1,800 Mexicans show up to the Battle of the Alamo?
A: They only had two vans.