What is a man's ultimate shame? When he runs into a wall with a hard-on and grabs his nose first!
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? I don't know, it has never happened.
Two drunks are sitting in a bar when one of them turns to the other one and asks, "Hey, isn't that Hortense?" The other drunk chimes in and says, "No, she looks pretty relaxed to me."
A boy asked his dad, "What's the difference between a woman and a slave?" His father replies, "I don't know, what?" His son says, "No, I was asking a question."
What did one lesbian vampire say to the other? Same time next month?