joke bank - Word Play Jokes

What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Doughnuts!

bigdaddy74

Q: Why didn't the sailors play cards?
A: Because the captain was on the deck.

slic hated

Q: My boyfriend is as beautiful as Frank Sinatra and as intelligent as Albert Einstein; what is his name?
A: Frankenstein.

Alejandro ...

Waiter: "Do you want any dessert?"
Teddy Bear: "No Thanks. I'm Stuffed!"

Anonymous

Three ladies were on a bus stop bench. One of the ladies looks at the other and asks her if she is Native American, She says, "Yes, I'm Arapaho." "Is that so?" says the first, "It just happens that I'm a Navajo." The third lady looks at both of them and says, "I'm a Dallas hoe."

Mark My Words

Q: What do you call a midget psychic who just escaped from prison?
A: A small medium at large.

TuboSheen

Why did the tomato turn red? Because he saw the salad dressing!

Yusuf

Q: What starts with F and ends with U-C-K?
A: Firetruck.

russ buss

A man is telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me $4000, but it's state of the art. It's perfect." "Really?" answers the neighbor. "What kind is it?" "12:30."

Marceline

What do cars eat on their toast? Traffic jam.

Anonymous

Teacher: "What is the largest city?"
Student: "Electricity!"

samarth.b.r

A man walks into a bar and sits down. He asks the bartender, "Can I have a cigarette?" The bartender replies, "Sure, the cigarette machine is over there." So he walks over to the machine and as he is about to order a cigarette, the machine suddenly says, "Oi, you bloody idiot." The man says with surprise in his voice, "That's not very nice." He returns to his bar stool without a cigarette and asks the bartender for some peanuts. The bartender passes the man a bowl of peanuts and the man hears one of the peanuts speak, "Ooh, I like your hair." The man says to the bartender, "Hey, what's going on here? Your cigarette machine is insulting me and this peanut is coming on to me. Why's this?" The bartender replies, "Oh, that's because the machine is out of order and the peanuts are complementary."

Liam Singl...