joke bank - Word Play Jokes

Q: When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, what happens?
A: UCLA.

Anonymous

Q: How do you get a baby alien to sleep?
A: You rocket.

Anonymous

Q: How do you get a blond on the roof?
A: You tell her the food is on the house.

Anonymous

''Doctor, my nose is 11 inches long!"
''Come back when it grows into a foot!"

hello_the_...

Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's very time consuming.

screwstock

Q: Why did the pig leave the costume party?
A: Because everyone thought he was a boar.

Anonymous

Q: What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A: You can roast beef but you cant pee soup.

Anonymous

Q: Did you hear about the guy who drank 8 Cokes?
A: He burped 7Up.

Anonymous

A teacher asks her class what their favorite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says 'G'. The teacher walks over to him and says, "Why is that, Angus?"

rudikelly

Q: Why do pirates not know the alphabet?
A: They always get stuck at "c."

Jerroy

What do you call four Mexicans in quicksand? Quatro sink-o!

kolchefske

I'm in trouble with my next door neighbors. I went over to their house recently to jump on there tramperleen. I had just got on when I heard a voice say, "Hey you, get off my daughter Erleen!"

joe curtis