TIM ALLEN - HOLLYWOOD - AUGUST 9 KEVIN NEALON - HOLLYWOOD - AUGUST 7 PRETTY, FUNNY WOMEN - HOLLYWOOD - JULY 19 ANDREW DICE CLAY - TROPICANA LAS VEGAS - AUG 17-19

joke bank - Word Play Jokes

Q: What do you call a famous fish?
A: A star fish.

Anonymous

How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Show him a used tampon and ask, "What period is this from?"

jakethasna...

Q: What's the difference between America and yogurt?
A: If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years, it develops a culture.

MsEverybod...

Q: What did the janitor yell when he jumped out of the closet?
A: "Supplies!"

LAMEGIRL23

Q: Why couldn't the Pirate learn the alphabet?
A: Because he was always lost at C.

Anonymous

A neutron walks into a bar and says, "I'd like a beer. How much will that be?" The bartender responds, "For you? No charge!"

Anonymous

Q: How do you get a blond on the roof?
A: You tell her the food is on the house.

Anonymous

Waiter: "Do you want any dessert?"
Teddy Bear: "No Thanks. I'm Stuffed!"

Anonymous

Teacher: "What is the largest city?"
Student: "Electricity!"

samarth.b.r

This crazy guy walks into a restaurant and tells the waiter, “Lemme get a cheeseburger, not too rare, not too well done, but right in the groove. Lemme get some fries, not too crispy, not too burnt, but right in the groove. And while you’re at it, throw in a shake, not too thin, not too thick, but right in groove.” The waiter took down the order and came back five minutes later and told the man, “The cook said you can kiss his ass, not to the left, not to the right, but right in the groove.”

robboss301

Q: Why do pirates not know the alphabet?
A: They always get stuck at "c."

Jerroy

Q: Can a match box?
A: No, but a tin can.

Anonymous