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joke bank - Word Play Jokes

Q: Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?

A: Cause he was outstanding in his field.

Anonymous

Yo mamma is so fat that when she sat on a laptop, the hardware turned into software!

Anonymous

Q: What did the storm say to the almond tree?
A: "Hold on to your nuts, cause you're about to get a blowjob."

lawl

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Yodelay hee.
Yodelay hee who?
I like your yodeling!

Anonymous

I hate school and got caught skipping the other day. My principal said, "Walk normal next time, you fruitcake."

Seth Rihn

Q: How do convicts get drugs while they're in prison?
A: Some asshole brings 'em in.

Jimmy Carr

Q: Which state has the most questions?
A: Alaska.

joke lover

Q: Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
A: Because then it'd be a foot!

TheLaughFa...

Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck.

Tonymous

Fe = Iron.
Male = Man.
Fe + Male = Iron Man.
I have been having sex with Iron Man.

Fred

My wife and I are planning our 21st wedding anniversary celebration. Here lies the problem: she wants to go to Outback Steakhouse, I want sex, and my mother-in-law thinks we should renew our vows at church. Well, I'm all for compromise, so we should have sex outback of the church.

Mark My Words

A naked man broke into a church. The police chased him around and finally caught him by the organ.

Mark My Words