joke bank - Word Play Jokes

Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
A: Envelope.

Q: Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?
A: Because he was always spotted.

Q: How do astronomers organize a party?
A: They planet.

Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A: A gummy bear.

A man is being arrested by a female police officer, who informs him, "Anything you say can and will be held against you." The man replies, "Boobs!"

Q: Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn?
A: Because Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

I was wondering why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger, and then it hit me.

Q: Why did the can crusher quit his job?
A: Because it was soda pressing.

A man got hit in the head with a can of Coke, but he was alright because it was a soft drink.

Q: What do computers eat for a snack?
A: Microchips!

Mother superior tells two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes. One nun suggests to the other, "Hey, let's take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door." So they do this, and begin painting their room. Soon they hear a knock at the door. They ask, "Who is it?" "Blind man!" The nuns look at each other and one nun says, "He's blind, so he can't see. What could it hurt?" They let him in. The blind man walks in and says, "Hey, nice tits. Where do you want me to hang the blinds?"

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.