Chocolate Sundaes is live this Sunday! Stay tuned to see the biggest names of comedy on New Material Night with Kevin Nealon Catch Tim Allen monthly on our Hollywood stage

joke bank - Word Play Jokes

A man who is just married is flying to the Florida Keys for a business trip. His new bride is to accompany him the next day. When he gets there, he e-mails his wife to let her know he made it there safely. When he sends the e-mail, he mistypes the address. In Boston, a grieving widow, whose husband has recently passed away, receives the e-mail. She reads it, screams, and faints. Hearing her grandmother’s cry, the widow's 18 year old granddaughter runs into the living room to see the computer on, with a message that reads, "Dear love, I just got here. Preparing for your arrival tomorrow. Can't wait to see you. Love, Me. P.S. Sure is hot down here."

gericagijane

A drunk walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck. The bartender says, "You can stay but don't try to start anything."

Anonymous

Q: What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
A: I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.

TheLaughFa...

Q: How come oysters never donate to charity?
A: Because they are shellfish.

me

Q: What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A: A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

Anonymous

The words election and erection are spelled similarly. They both have the same meaning too: a dick rising to power.

Delilah Ro...

Q: What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
A: Fingernails.

TheLaughFa...

Q: What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
A: You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish.

Lauren P.

Q: Why did the school kids eat their homework?
A: Because their teacher told them it was a piece of cake.

capcon

Q: What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?
A: He wiped his bum.

That Wright

Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a no bell prize.

Bradley th...

"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled, "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted to. I was keeping the umbrella.

Kaziah