joke bank - Word Play Jokes

Q: What is Mozart doing right now?
A: Decomposing.

Q: Why is Peter Pan always flying?
A: Because he neverlands.

Q. What is the color of the wind?
A. Blew.

Q: How come oysters never donate to charity?
A: Because they are shellfish.

Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: Because they don't know where home is.

Q: What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?
A: He wiped his bum.

Q: What do you call someone without a nose or a body?
A: Nobodynose.

Q: What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
A: Fingernails.

For a period, Houdini used a trap door in every single show he did…I guess you could say it was a stage he was going through.

Q: What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A: A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

A teacher asks her class what their favorite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says 'G'. The teacher walks over to him and says, "Why is that, Angus?"

One night a lady came home from her weekly prayer meeting, found she was being robbed, and she shouted out, "Acts 2:38: 'Repent & be baptized & your sins will be forgiven.'" The robber quickly gave up & the lady rang the police. While handcuffing the criminal, a policeman said, "Gee mate, you gave up pretty easily. How come you gave up so quickly?" The robber said, "She said she had an axe and two 38's!"