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joke bank - Word Play Jokes

Q: What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
A: A waist of time.

Apineash a...

Three ladies were on a bus stop bench. One of the ladies looks at the other and asks her if she is Native American, She says, "Yes, I'm Arapaho." "Is that so?" says the first, "It just happens that I'm a Navajo." The third lady looks at both of them and says, "I'm a Dallas hoe."

Mark My Words

A lot of people cry when they cut an onion. The trick is not to form an emotional bond.

Scott Walter

A teacher asks her class what their favorite letter is. A student puts up his hand and says 'G'. The teacher walks over to him and says, "Why is that, Angus?"

rudikelly

Q: How do fish get high?
A: Seaweed.

claudette

Q: Why did the painting go to jail?
A: It was framed.

Capricorn37

Q: What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
A: Carlos.

Steven Casby

Q: What do cars eat on their toast?
A: Traffic jam.

Anonymous

Q: What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?
A: "Better hold onto your nuts because this is no ordinary blowjob."

dhattprettymf

Q: Why didn’t the melons get married?
A: Because they cantaloupe.

Takeoff Zebra

Little Johnny came home from school and heard the word "b*tch." He asks his mom what the word meant and she responds, "It means priest." The next day little Johnny comes home and hears the word "sh*t" and asks his dad what it means. His dad answers, "It means food on the table." At school, he hears the word "f*cking" and asks his mom what it means. She responds, "It means getting ready." The next day a priest came over for dinner and little Johnny opened the door and says, "Hey son of a b*tch. There's sh*t on the table and my parents are upstairs f*cking!"

gabbylove

Two fish are in a tank. One turns to the other and says, "Hey, do you know how to drive this thing?"

Anonymous