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joke bank - Animal Jokes

Q: Why do seagulls fly over the sea? A: Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

Anonymous

A man needed a horse, so he went to a temple and got one. Before he left, the priest told him that it was a special horse. In order to make the horse go, you say, "Thank God," and for it to stop you say, "Amen." So the man left, and a few minutes later he dozed off on his horse. Hours later, he woke up and his horse was racing him towards the edge of a cliff. Just in time, he shouted "Amen!" and the horse stopped a few inches from the edge. "Whew," said the man, "thank God!"

moe112

It was a baby mosquito's first day to fly out from home. When the mosquito came back home later that day, the father mosquito asked, "How was your journey?" The baby mosquito replied, "It went great. Everyone was clapping for me!"

Swati

Q: Why does a cow wear a bell around its neck?
A: Because its horns don't work.

Krispyk

Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Climb a tree and act like a nut.

Anonymous

Q: What's the importance of capitalization?
A: You can either help your Uncle Jack off a horse or help your uncle jack off a horse.

The Fella ...

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

TheLaughFa...

One day a man was walking in the woods when he got lost. For two days he roamed around trying to find a way out. He had not eaten anything during this period and was famished. Over on a rock ledge he spotted a bald eagle. He killed it, and started to eat it. Surprisingly, a couple of park rangers happen to find him at that moment, and arrested him for killing an endangered species. In court, he pleads innocent to the charges against him, claiming that if he didn't eat the bald eagle he would have died from starvation. The judge ruled in his favor. In the judge's closing statement he asked the man, "I would like you to tell me something before I let you go. I have never eaten a bald eagle, nor ever plan on it, but what did it taste like?" The man answered, "Well, it tasted like a cross between a whooping crane and a spotted owl!"

Judith McG...

Q: What did the spider do on the computer?
A: Made a website!

Anonymous

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagles

Anonymous

Q: What happens when you cross a shark with a cow?
A: I don't know but I wouldn't milk it.

Ahadito

Q: What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A: A thesaurus.

Silenxio M...