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joke bank - Animal Jokes

Q: Why do birds fly South for the winter?
A: It's too far to walk.

TheLaughFa...

Q: What did the judge say when a skunk walked into the courtroom?
A: "Odor in the court!"

jonpingel

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the edge of their pool and throw them fish?

Anonymous

Q: What do you call a famous fish?
A: A star fish.

Anonymous

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

tztmama60

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

A: Because chickens weren't around yet.

Anonymous

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

garychatte...

Q: What's the last thing that goes through a bug's mind as it hits your windshield?
A: Its butt.

LEXMIA

Waiter: "Do you want any dessert?"
Teddy Bear: "No Thanks. I'm Stuffed!"

Anonymous

A man rushes his limp dog to the veterinarian. The doctor pronounces the dog dead. The agitated man demands a second opinion. The vet goes into the back room and comes out with a cat. The cat sniffs the body and meows. The vet says, "I'm sorry, but the cat thinks that your dog is dead, too." The man is still unwilling to accept that his dog is dead. The vet brings in a black Labrador. The lab sniffs the body and barks. The vet says, "I'm sorry, but the lab thinks your dog is dead, too." The man finally resigns to the diagnosis and asks how much he owes. The vet answers, "$650." "$650 to tell me my dog is dead?" exclaims the man. "Well," the vet replies, "I would only have charged you $50 for my initial diagnosis. The additional $600 is for the cat scan and lab tests."

ebaquino

Q: Why did the bunny go to the hospital? A: For a hoperation.

Anonymous

Q: What do you call a T-Rex's bruise? A: A dino-sore.

I Rindflei...