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joke bank - Animal Jokes

Q: Why are fish easy to weigh?
A: Because they have their own scales.

Rexx

What did Santa call his reindeer that couldn't fly? Dinner.

amandadean526

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

garychatte...

Q: What happens when you cross a shark with a cow?
A: I don't know but I wouldn't milk it.

Ahadito

A baby snake asked it's mom, "Mommy are we poisonous?" The mother snake responded, "Yes honey, but why do you want to know?" The baby snake responded, "Because I just bit myself..."

nimabeni

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Ell-if-I-no (Hell if I know).

Anonymous

Q: What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A: A thesaurus.

Silenxio M...

Q: What do you call a cow with two legs?
A: Lean beef.

Anonymous

Q: What's the last thing that goes through a bug's mind as it hits your windshield?
A: Its butt.

LEXMIA

Q: Why do seagulls fly over the sea? A: Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

Anonymous

Q: What do elephants use for tampons?
A: Sheep.

mgrector

A statue of a naked woman and a naked man stand in a park at night. Suddenly from out of nowhere, a magical genie arrives and grants the statues each one wish to be fulfilled. Both the female and male statues agree on 15 minutes as a real man and woman in the bushes behind them to "get things done." The genie gives a knowing grin and grants the wish. The man and woman immediately jump behind the bushes and screaming sounds and laughter can be heard from their activities. 12 minutes later they return to the front of the bush again claiming they are finished. "Well now, that was kinda quick!" the genie says. "You can do it a second time for the remaining 3 minutes if you want," the genie tells them, winking his eye. Both the female and male look at each other and smile. The man says to the woman, "Okay great, but this time you get to hold the pigeon so I can shit on him!"

8AR7