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joke bank - Blonde Jokes

A blonde is walking down the street and a car pulled up next to her. The man in the car says to her, ''What do you have in the bag?'' The blonde replies: ''I have chickens!'' The man thinks for a moment and says, ''If I can guess how many chickens you have in the bag, can I have one?'' The blonde thinks that it sounds fair and replies, ''Okay, but I'll make the bet even better! If you can guess exactly how many chickens I have in the bag I will give you BOTH of them!"

Anonymous

Q: Why did the blonde pee on the ground?
A: Because she saw a sign that said 'Wet Floor.'

Anonymous

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: Give her a box of corn flakes and tell her it's a jigsaw puzzle.

ben (who i...

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Too many to count.

batallonesa

A smart blonde, Santa Claus, and a leprechaun are in a kitchen. There is a $100 dollar bill on the floor. Who picks it up? Nobody, because none of them exist.

Marek Mason

A blonde is swimming in a river. A man walks up and asks her, "What are you doing in there?" She says, "I'm washing my clothes." The man asks, "Why don't you use a washing machine?" The blonde says, "I tried that, but it was too dizzy.

Botboy

A blonde approaches a stranger and asks what time it is. The stranger says, "11:45." The blonde says, "Really? That's so weird. Every time I ask that question, I get a different answer."

laugh_hard...

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

Matt Hemming

How do blonde brain cells die? Alone.

miked8888

Two blondes were shopping at the mall. When they were done, they went out to their car, an awesome leather-interior convertible, but they realized they had locked the keys in the car. So they both kind of stood there and thought for a while. Then one of the girls had the bright idea to try to open the car with a coat hanger, so she started fiddling with the lock. The other blonde looked up at the sky, became very worried, and pleaded, "Hurry, hurry! It's going to rain and we left the top down!"

Faith

Q: What are a blonde's first words after graduating college?
A: "Would you like fries with that?"

JKLouws

Three blondes and a brunette are hanging on the wing of an airplane in flight. The pilot tells them that they are too heavy and one of them has to get off or they will all die. After a minute, the blondes decide that the brunette should get off. "Okay, but I want these to be my last words," the brunette replies and begins to sing, "if you're happy and you know it clap your hands..."

Anonymous