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joke bank - Blonde Jokes
Q: Why do blondes leave empty beer cans in their refrigerator?
A: For their friends that don't drink.
Q: How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day?
A: She can't find her pencil and her tampon is behind her ear.
Q: Why do blondes have "TGIF" written on their shoes?
A: To remind them Toes Go In First.
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are driving in a truck. The brunette and redhead are in the cab and the blonde is in the back. They accidentally drive off a bridge into water. The brunette and redhead get out and swim to the surface and wait for the blonde. After a few minutes the blonde surfaces and the other two ask, "What took so long?" The blonde replies, "I couldn't get the tailgate down."
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are in a Mexican prison. They committed a crime and have been sentenced to death. The women are instructed to say when they are ready for the firing squad to shoot and kill them. The brunette is called up. She says, "Ready, aim, tornado!" Afraid of an approaching funnel cloud, the police quickly turn around and the brunette runs away. Once regrouped, the redhead is summoned. She says, "Ready, aim, earthquake!" Fooled again, the police quickly turn around to get cover while the redhead runs away. Then it's the blonde's turn, who says, "Ready, aim, fire!"
A blonde crashed a helicopter. A police officer asked her what happened. She says, "It got cold so I turned off the fan."
A blonde decided to paint a room. When her husband got home, he asked, "Why are you wearing an Alaskan and a winter coat?" She replied, "The can said for best results apply 2 coats."
Q: What’s the difference between a smart blonde and a unicorn?
A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters.
Why did the blonde have sex with a Mexican? Her teacher told her, she had to do an Essay.
Q: Did you hear about the new blonde-made Inventions?
A: Solar Powered Flashlights, Helicopter Ejection Seats, and the Submarine Screen Door.