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joke bank - Clean Jokes

Q: What did the cross-eyed teacher say?
A: I can't control my pupils!

Joke Master

If a man opens the car door for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.

Anonymous

Q: Why didn’t the melons get married?
A: Because they cantaloupe.

Takeoff Zebra

Son: "Dad, when will I be old enough so I don't have to ask mom for her permission to go out?"
Dad: "Son, even I haven't grown old enough to go out without her permission!"

Naushil Me...

Q. What can you give and keep at the same time?
A. A cold!

hello_the_...

Q: Why are hairdressers never late for work?
A: Because they know all the short cuts!

hello_the_...

Q: What do cars eat on their toast?
A: Traffic jam.

Anonymous

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you! Need a tissue?

Anonymous

Q: Why did Cinderella get kicked off the soccer team?
A: Because she ran away from the ball.

ellie pick...

Bob goes to see his friend Pete. He finds Pete in his barn dancing naked around his John Deere. "What are you doing!" asks Bob. Pete stops dancing & says, "My wife has been ignoring me lately so I talked to my psychiatrist and he said I needed to do some thing sexy to a tractor." [to attract her]

Rockyz

Q: What did the judge say when a skunk walked into the courtroom?
A: "Odor in the court!"

jonpingel

Question: What did one toilet roll say to the other toilet roll?
Answer: "People keep on ripping me off!"

Anonymous