joke bank - Clean Jokes

Q. Why did the apple run away?
A. Because the banana split!

hello_the_...

Q: Why do centipedes have 100 legs?
A: So they can walk.

Anonymous

Jim, Scott and Alex are tired after traveling all day and check into a hotel. When they get to reception, they find out they'll have to walk 75 flights of stairs to get to their room because the elevator is out of order. Jim suggests that they do something interesting to pass time while they walk the 75 flights. Jim will tell jokes, Scott will sing songs, and Alex will tell sad stories. So Jim tells jokes for 25 flights, Scott sings songs for 25 flights and Alex tells sad stories for 24 flights. When they reach the 75th floor, Alex tells his saddest story of all, "Guys, I left our room key at reception."

Sid

Q: Why didn’t the melons get married?
A: Because they cantaloupe.

Takeoff Zebra

Q: If a plane crashed on the Canada/USA border, where would the survivors be buried?
A: You don't bury survivors.

Anonymous

Two old friends crossed paths after not seeing one another for almost a decade.
Utkarsh: "What are you doing these days?"
Sparsh: "PHD."
Utkarsh: "Wow! You're a doctor!"
Sparsh: "No, Pizza Home Delivery."

Aayush Kumar

Fred: "Why do elephants wear red nail polish?"
Bob: "I don't know, why?"
Fred: "To hide in cherry trees."
Bob: "But I've never seen an elephant in a cherry tree."
Fred: "See, it works."

Swiftie

What does an air conditioner have in common with a computer? They both lose efficiency as soon as you open windows.

Annie X

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you! Need a tissue?

Anonymous

Q: Why did Cinderella get kicked off the soccer team?
A: Because she ran away from the ball.

ellie pick...

Q: What do cars eat on their toast?
A: Traffic jam.

Anonymous

Three old friends got together and were discussing what movie they had watched when they conceived their children. One lady says she had just watched a movie called The Search for One-eye Jimmy and nine months later she gave birth to her baby. Another lady says, "Oh, I saw the movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and then nine months later I had septuplets." The last lady gasps and exclaims, "Oh no, I just watched 101 Dalmations!"

PEPE WHO