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joke bank - Clean Jokes

Q: What do you call someone without a nose or a body?
A: Nobodynose.

Dude

Mahatma Gandhi often walked barefoot which produced an impressive set of callouses on his feet. He also ate very little, making him rather frail and with his odd diet he often suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed with halitosis.

Audra, Me,...

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagles

Anonymous

Q. What did the pop star do when he locked himself out?
A. He sang until he found the right key!

hello_the_...

Q: Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?
A: Because it’s pointless!

Anonymous

A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in pal. You're obviously drunk." The wasted man asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?" "Yeah buddy, I'm sure," said the cop, "Let's go." Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thank goodness. I thought I was crippled."

laughflava

Q: What did the judge say when a skunk walked into the courtroom?
A: "Odor in the court!"

jonpingel

Fred: "Why do elephants wear red nail polish?"
Bob: "I don't know, why?"
Fred: "To hide in cherry trees."
Bob: "But I've never seen an elephant in a cherry tree."
Fred: "See, it works."

Swiftie

Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

A: Because chickens weren't around yet.

Anonymous

Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on.The second lawyer looked at him and said, "You're crazy! You'll never be able to outrun that bear!" "I don't have to," the first lawyer replied. "I only have to outrun you."

TheLaughFa...

A lot of people cry when they cut an onion. The trick is not to form an emotional bond.

Scott Walter

Teacher: "Where was the Constitution of India signed?"
Student: "At the bottom of the page!"

sweety