Q: What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
A: "You're too young to smoke."
A young boy came home from school and told his mother, "I had a big fight with my classmate. He called me a sissy." The mother asked, "What did you do?" The boy replied, "I hit him with my purse!"
If Mary had Jesus, and Jesus is the lamb of God, does that mean Mary had a little lamb?
A drunk walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck. The bartender says, "You can stay but don't try to start anything."
At the doctor's office, Tom was getting a check up. "I have good news and bad news," says the doctor. "The good news is you have 24 hours left to live." Tom replies, "That's the good news?!" Then the doctor says, "The bad news is I should have told you that yesterday."