CHRIS D'ELIA IS BACK ON THE LUCK OF THE IRISH SHOW ON FEB. 23RD! LAUGH ALL NIGHT WITH SOCAL'S BEST COMICS ON ALL-STAR COMEDY EVERY FRIDAY AND SATURDAY NIGHT IN HOLLYWOOD! YOU NEVER KNOW WHO COULD DROP BY ON THE SET DANE COOK IS BACK THIS TUESDAY (FEB 20) AND SATURDAY (FEB 24) TO MAKE YOU LAUGH ALL NIGHT! DON'T MISS THIS SO GET YOUR TICKETS NOW!

joke bank - Clean Jokes

A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs into two priests. He goes over to the first priest and says, "Dude, I'm Jesus Christ!" And the priest says, "No son, you're not." So the drunk goes over to the second priest and says, "Man, I'm Jesus Christ!" Then the priest says, "No son, you're not." Finally, the drunk had enough and said, "Here, I'll prove it." He walks back into the bar with both priests and the bartender looks up and sees the drunk and says, "Jesus Christ, you're back AGAIN?"

Kacie Weggies

Q: How did the blonde fisherman die?
A: He was run over by the Zamboni.

Anonymous

Q: What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?
A: A pool table.

Anonymous

Q: What do you do with epileptic lettuce?
A: You make a seizure salad.

Anonymous

Ben: "Dad, there is a hole in my shoe."
Dad: "Yes, Ben, that's where you put your foot."

YOLOSWAG36...

Q: What has a face and two hands but no arms, legs, or a body?
A: A clock.

Clocked

Q: Why do pirates like algebra?
A: "Annex" marks the spot.

Anonymous

Q: Where did the general keep his armies?
A: Up his sleevies.

Donut 347

Q: Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? A: To get to the bottom.

firts grad...

I'm thinking of becoming a hitman... I heard they make a killing.

Anonymous

A woman answered the doorbell with a man standing on her porch. The man said, "I'm terribly sorry. I just ran over your cat and I would like to replace it for you." The woman replied, "Well that's alright with me, but how are you at catching mice?"

Anonymous

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Daisy.
Daisy who?
Daisy me rollin', they hatin'.

nashty.pum...