joke bank - Clean Jokes

What happens when you play a country song backwards? You get a new truck, a new wife, and a new dog.

Q: How did the blonde fisherman die?
A: He was run over by the Zamboni.

Q: Why did the ink pots cry?
A: Their mother was in the pen doing a long sentence.

Q: What do you get with a fist and a long piece of wire?
A: A horrible punchline.

Q: Where do bees go to the toilet?
A: The BP station.

A magician was driving down the road... then he turned into a driveway.

I’m looking for a bank which can perform two things;
Give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.

Q : Why do museums have old dinosaur bones ?
A : Because they can't afford new ones

A woman answered the doorbell with a man standing on her porch. The man said, "I'm terribly sorry. I just ran over your cat and I would like to replace it for you." The woman replied, "Well that's alright with me, but how are you at catching mice?"

Q: Why didn't the witch fly on her broom when she was angry?
A: She was afraid she would fly off the handle.

Q: What do you do with epileptic lettuce?
A: You make a seizure salad.

Coach: "Why are you late for the game?"
Caterpillar: "I had to put my shoes on."