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joke bank - Clean Jokes

Q: What is the king of all inches?
A: The ruler.

Anonymous

A ham sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve lunch here."

Nicklass

Teacher: "Why does a stone sink in water when you thrown it in?"
Student: "Because it does not know how to swim."

Anonymous

I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.

J.J. Lafave

An uneducated father with his educated son went for a camping
they set up a tent and slept
father gets up after sometime and asks his son"what can you see in the sky?"
son:i can see many stars
father:what does it resemble?
son:there are many planets
father beats on his sons head and says "Someone has stolen our tent"

Anonymous

Did you know there is a species of antelope capable of jumping higher then the average house due to its powerful hind legs and the fact that the average house can't jump?

JJ le roiche

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Cargo.
Cargo who?
Cargo "Beep! Beep!"

Emma

A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses five feet to the right. The statistician yells, "We got 'em!”

TheLaughFa...

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Abby.
Abby who?
Abby birthday!

King k

Q: Wanna hear a joke about a stone?
A: Never mind, I will just skip that one.

Laughathon

I went down the street to a 24-hour grocery store. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey! The sign says you're open 24 hours." He Said, "Yes, but not in a row!"

Anonymous

Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It is vey time consuming.

Anonymous