Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
Q: What happens when you cross a shark with a cow?
A: I don't know but I wouldn't milk it.
What goes up and down stairs with out moving? Carpet.
Q: What did one toilet say to the other toilet?
A: You look a bit flushed.
Question: What did one toilet roll say to the other toilet roll?
Answer: "People keep on ripping me off!"