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Q: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
A: It's okay. He woke up.

Pat

I was wondering why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger, and then it hit me.

Anonymous

Q: How do trees access the internet?
A: They log in.

Kimberly Mauldin

A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car. After looking the man over the policeman says, "Sir, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?" The man gets really indignant and says, "Officer, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?"

TheLaughFactory

Q: What did the banana say to the doctor?
A: "I'm not peeling well."

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