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joke bank - Clean Jokes

Q: What type of sandals do frogs wear?
A: Open-toad!

polina

Q: How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two: one to change it and another one to change it back again.

TheLaughFa...

Q: What is the difference between a teacher and a train?
A: One says, "Spit out your gum," and the other says, "Choo choo choo!"

Capricorn37

Man: "Hey baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not enter."

Anonymous

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!!

My step dad

A man hasn't been feeling well, so he goes to his doctor for a complete checkup. Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results. "I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left." "Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "How long have I got?" "Ten," the doctor says sadly. "Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!" "Nine..."

Roberto

A drunk walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck. The bartender says, "You can stay but don't try to start anything."

Anonymous

Q: What happens once in a minute and twice in a moment but never in a decade?
A: The letter "m."

Iggy

Q: What do cats eat for breakfast?
A: Mice Krispies.

slim

Q: What do you get when you cross a fish and an elephant?
A: Swimming trunks.

Syd the Kyd

There's a blond and a brunette in a car. The brunette is driving while the blonde is in the passenger seat. They're going down a steep hill when the brunette realizes that the brakes don't work. The brunette tells the blonde that the brakes don't work and they will drive off the side of the cliff because they failed to stop. The blonde then replies, "Don't worry! There's a stop sign ahead."

Mikayla

Q: Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?
A: Because it’s pointless!

Anonymous