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joke bank - Family Jokes

A girl asks her father, " Why does it rain? Is it God sweating or crying?" " No," says her father, " it rains to make the plants grow. Do you understand?" " Not exactly," says the girl. " Why does it rain on the sidewalk?"

JKLouw

Little Johnny came in from the backyard sobbing. His mother asked "What's the matter?" "Dad was fixing the fence and hit his thumb with the hammer," he said through his tears. "That's not so serious," his mother said, "and a big boy like you shouldn't cry about that. Why didn't you just laugh?" "I did!" cried Johnny.

ldycre8or

Son: "Dad, there is someone at the door to collect donations for a community swimming pool."
Father: "Okay, give him a glass of water."

looloo

What is the difference between an outlaw and an in-law? Outlaws are wanted.

Anonymous

Q: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? A: Because the "P" is silent.

Anonymous

Q. Why do anime fans listen to the radio in the morning?
A. Because they enjoy car toons!

hello_the_...

Q: What did the beaver say to the tree?
A: "It's been nice gnawing you!"

Anonymous

On his first visit to the zoo, a little boy stared at the caged stork for a long time and asked his dad, "Why doesn't the stork recognize me?"

Dickie

Q. What's an astronaut's favorite social media website?

A. MySpace

Anonymous

Q: What's the difference between a genealogist and a gynecologist?
A: The genealogist checks the family tree and the gynecologist checks the family bush.

Mark My Words

Q: Why did the ink pots cry?
A: Their mother was in the pen doing a long sentence.

Anonymous

Q: What is brown and sticky?
A: A stick

Anonymous