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joke bank - Family Jokes

Q: Why did the ink pots cry?
A: Their mother was in the pen doing a long sentence.

Anonymous

A man admitted he lied on his income tax return: he listed himself as the head of the household!

TheLaughFa...

Ben: "Dad, there is a hole in my shoe."
Dad: "Yes, Ben, that's where you put your foot."

YOLOSWAG36...

Coach: "Why are you late for the game?"
Caterpillar: "I had to put my shoes on."

Cherri

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed. I never knew they worked.

lucy lemon

Two cannibals are eating dinner and one says, "I hate my mother-in-law." The other replies, "Well, just eat your noodles, then."

Anonymous

The bride, upon her engagement, goes to her mother and says, "I've found a man just like Father!" Her mother replies, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

xmastawong

Two cannibals, a father and son, are walking down the street, when they notice a hot girl passing by. The son says to the father, "Daddy, I'm hungry, let’s eat that girl that just passed by." The father replies, "I've got a better idea son, let’s take this one home and eat your mother instead!"

qyomjan

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

Tanro Taitai

The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.

leninakansy

Two men are talking and one says to the other, “My wife’s doctor says she has menopause, and, man, has she been moody lately. How long do the symptoms of menopause usually last?” The other man replies, “Let me put it this way: menopause will be listed as the cause on your death certificate.”

TheLaughFa...

Q: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
A: Its OK. He woke up.

Anonymous