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joke bank - Family Jokes

Q :How did Harry Potter get down the hill?
A: Walking......Jk,Rowling

Anonymous

A man went to the All Stars game with two front row seat tickets. He sat down and then another man asked him if the other chair was taken. The man said " no, it was supposed to be for my wife." The other man said " well where is she? And he said "she died two days ago" from a stroke. The other man said "well thats unfortunate, I'm so sorry for you. But should'nt you give this seat to another family members?" And the man said, "no they're all at the funeral"

Anonymous

mom said joe can i have a shower with you tonight? yes honey but don't look up!
when they got in the shower joe looked up and asked what is that mum? mom said
it is Tokyo!the next day the same thing happened but this time he asked his dad
when they took a shower he looked up and asked what is that? it is a huge dinosaur! that night he asked both his parents can i sleep with you tonight? sure they said so they all hopped in bed and joe looked under the covers and said OH NO THE DINOSAUR IS ATTACKING TOKYO!

libby

Boy: Hey mum can I have 100 dollars?

Mum: Son money doesn't grow on trees

Boy: Where does money come from?

Mum: Paper

Boy: Does Paper come from?

Mum: ...

Anonymous

Kid ask your dad this? How were people born then say this.
So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

April Edwards

Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she might Let it Go... Let it Go...

frozen