joke bank - Family Jokes

One day Jimmy got home early from school and his mom asked, "Why are you home so early?" He answered, "Because I was the only one that answered a question in my class." She said, "Wow, my son is a genius. What was the question?" Jimmy replied, "The question was 'Who threw the trash can at the principal's head?'"

Anonymous

Q: Why did the can crusher quit his job?
A: Because it was soda pressing.

Brock

A mother said to her son, "Look at that kid over there; he's not misbehaving." The son replied, "Maybe he has good parents then!"

Anonymous

Q: Why did Adele cross the road?
A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

SOME DUDE

Dad: "Can I see your report card, son?"
Son: "I don't have it."
Dad: "Why?"
Son: "I gave it to my friend. He wanted to scare his parents."

Anonymous

A mom texts, "Hi! Son, what does IDK, LY, & TTYL mean?" He texts back, "I Don't Know, Love You, & Talk To You Later." The mom texts him, "It's ok, don't worry about it. I'll ask your sister, love you too."

valli :)

Q: Can February march?
A: No, but April may.

brock

A: I have the perfect son.
B: Does he smoke?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he drink whiskey?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: Does he ever come home late?
A: No, he doesn’t.
B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he?
A: He will be six months old next Wednesday.

tumblr jokr

Q. How much room is needed for fungi to grow?
A. As mushroom as possible

BRENNEJM

Q: How do you make a tissue dance?
A: Put a little boogie in it.

make peopl...

A young boy came home from school and told his mother, "I had a big fight with my classmate. He called me a sissy." The mother asked, "What did you do?" The boy replied, "I hit him with my purse!"

Anonymous

Q: Why did the fish blush?
A: Because it saw the ocean's bottom.

cj