joke bank - Insult Jokes

A man siting at a bar asked a pretty woman sitting next to him, Excuse me, but can I smell your pussy?" "Get away from me, you pervert," she replied. "Oh, I'm sorry," exclaims the man, "It must be your feet."

I'll never forget the first time we met, although I'll keep trying.

Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: Because they don't know where home is.

Insult: If you were any dumber, your head would implode.
Response: If you were a little bit more intelligent you'd still be stupid.

You're so fat you're the reason why the Earth is tilted.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Q: How do you leave a jackass in suspense?
A: Don't know. I'll tell you tomorrow

A man and woman were having sex. After they were done, the man asks the woman, "Are you a nurse?" The woman answers, "Yes. How did you know?" The man replies, "Because you took care of me so well." Then the woman asks the man, "Are you an anesthesiologist?" He says proudly, "Yes. How do you know?" The woman answers, "Because I didn't feel a thing."

Q: How do you get 500 old cows in a barn?
A: Put up a Bingo sign.

You're lucky mirrors don't talk, or laugh for that matter.

Q: Who is the poorest guy in the south?
A: The Tooth Fairy.

I hear you are very kind to animals, so please give that face back to the gorilla.