joke bank - Insult Jokes

Hold still, I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

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Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.

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I don't mind that you are talking, so long as you don't mind that I'm not listening.

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You should do some soul-searching. Maybe you'll find one.

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Save your breath. You'll need it to blow up your date.

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If beauty was a drop of water, you'd be the Sahara Desert.

Alaska Baker

How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?

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I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent.

So I said, "Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?"

One of them snarled at me, "It's Wales, Dumbo!"

So I corrected myself, "My apologies, so are you two whales from Ireland?"

End on story

Anonymous

Tell me, as an outsider, what do you think of the human race?

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Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
I have five fingers;
The middle one's for you.

My brother...

If ugliness were bricks, you'd be the Great Wall of China!

Anonymous

Listen, are you always this stupid or are you just making a special effort today?

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