Chocolate Sundaes is live this Sunday! Catch Tim Allen monthly on our Hollywood stage

joke bank - Insult Jokes

If I was as ugly as you were, I wouldn't say "Hi" to people. I'd say "BOO!"

LaughFactory

Tom: "Were you born on the highway?"
Jerry: "Uh no, why?"
Tom: "Because that's where most accidents happen."

PandaBuddy...

I believe in respect for the dead, in fact I could only respect you if you were dead.

LaughFactory

Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.

LaughFactory

What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? A BMW has pricks on the inside!

brent

If I ever need a brain transplant, I'd choose yours because I'd want a brain that had never been used.

LaughFactory

How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?

LaughFactory

Sure, I've seen people like you before, but I had to pay an admission fee.

LaughFactory

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

ferrari

If you call one of those psychic hotlines and they don't greet you by your name, you should hang up!

Micahskatt2

You're so ugly, you make blind kids cry.

LaughFactory

Q: What is the difference between a Harley and a vacuum cleaner?
A: The location of the dirt bag.

yesca487