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joke bank - Miscellaneous Jokes

Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Doris!
Doris who?
Doris locked that’s why I am knocking!

sharona315

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

Anonymous

If beauty was a drop of water, then you would be the Atlantic Ocean.

BigDaddyCat

I like escalators because they can never break, they can only become stairs. You should never see a sign next to an escalator that says, "Escaltor Temporarily Out of Service." Just a sign that says, "Escalator Temporarily Stairs, Sorry for the Inconvenience."

Nebikinezer

A man goes skydiving. After a fantastic free fall, he pulls the rip cord to open his parachute but nothing happens. He tries everything but can't get it open. Just then another man flies by him, going up. The skydiver yells, "Hey, you know anything about parachutes?" The man replies, "No, you know anything about dynamite?"

Anonymous

What does Delaware?


New Jersey!

Cynthia Ke...

Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.

Anonymous

"My brother likes to brag about the size of his penis which doesn't bother me, I just wish he wouldn't rub it in my face."

chr1sfenton

Did you hear about the dyslexic traffic cop who spent the weekend handing out IUD's?

Mark My Words

Q: How do you put an elephant into a Safeway bag?
A: You take the "f" out of safe & the "f" out of way- wait, there's no "f" in way!

bedge o matic

Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?" One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie." "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was!" The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.

zesdus

How many real men does it take to change a light bulb? None. Real men aren't afraid of the dark!

JSM422