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joke bank - Miscellaneous Jokes

A doctor tells an old couple at his office he needs to get a stool sample, a urine sample, and a blood test from the old man. Hard of hearing, the old man asks his wife what the doctor said. The wife replies, "He needs a pair of your underwear."

Mark My Words

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Anonymous

A woman was taking an afternoon nap. When she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace. What do you think it means?" "You'll know tonight," he said. That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams."

Hayden Thomas

Q: Have you heard about the new restaurant called Karma?
A: There’s no menu; you get what you deserve.

TheLaughFactory

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you! Need a tissue?

Anonymous