joke bank - Office Jokes

What is the difference between a waitress who works in a strip club and an actual stripper? About two weeks.

What can a goose do that a duck can't, but a lawyer should? Shove its bill up its ass!

A dentist told a mother, "I'm sorry madam, but I'll have to charge you a $100 for pulling your boy's tooth." The mother exclaimed, "A $100! You said it was only $20!" "Yes," replied the dentist, "but he yelled so loudly that he scared four other patients out of the office!"

If an accountant's spouse cannot sleep, what is the best cure? Ask the accountant to talk about their work.

Why can't designated hitters bake pancakes? They also forget the batter.

Why are proctologists so gloomy? They always have the end in sight.

How can you tell when an engineer is an extrovert. He stares at YOUR shoes while he talks to you.

We've been reading in the papers lately about terrible cruelty someone is causing to our winged friends by the shore, as many Pelicans have been found with their beaks cut off. Police suspect a local bill collector is behind it all.

Do you know what happens if you piss of a pilot? He takes off.

What did the fireman name his two sons? Jose and Jose B.

They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but lawyers can find you anywhere.

Why was the civil engineer's relationship so unstable? Because there was no truss left!