joke bank - Office Jokes

A dentist told a mother, "I'm sorry madam, but I'll have to charge you a $100 for pulling your boy's tooth." The mother exclaimed, "A $100! You said it was only $20!" "Yes," replied the dentist, "but he yelled so loudly that he scared four other patients out of the office!"

If an accountant's spouse cannot sleep, what is the best cure? Ask the accountant to talk about their work.

Why are proctologists so gloomy? They always have the end in sight.

We've been reading in the papers lately about terrible cruelty someone is causing to our winged friends by the shore, as many Pelicans have been found with their beaks cut off. Police suspect a local bill collector is behind it all.

How can you tell when an engineer is an extrovert. He stares at YOUR shoes while he talks to you.

Do you know what happens if you piss of a pilot? He takes off.

They say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but lawyers can find you anywhere.

What did the fireman name his two sons? Jose and Jose B.

What do you call an honest businessman? Asif.

Why was the civil engineer's relationship so unstable? Because there was no truss left!

Employe: "I bet you $6,000 i can piss in your cup 30 meters away."
Boss: "Ok I would like to see you try."
Employe: As he moves on pissing all over the floor loosing $6,000 not caring.
Boss: "Ha you just lost $6,000."
Secratary: "God damnit!"
Boss: "Whats wrong?"
Secratary: "He bet me $200,000 he could piss allover your floor and you would be happy about it!"

Why can't designated hitters bake pancakes? They also forget the batter.