joke bank - Office Jokes

If debugging is the process of removing software bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.

Edsger Dij...

While visiting a friend in the hospital, a young man notices several pretty nurses, each one of them wearing a pin designed to look like an apple. “What does the pin signify?” he asks one of them. “Oh! Nothing,” she says with a chuckle, “we just use it to keep the doctors away.”

VinceA

What is the difference between a waitress who works in a strip club and an actual stripper? About two weeks.

fimthelim

A dentist told a mother, "I'm sorry madam, but I'll have to charge you a $100 for pulling your boy's tooth." The mother exclaimed, "A $100! You said it was only $20!" "Yes," replied the dentist, "but he yelled so loudly that he scared four other patients out of the office!"

jahangir1352

Boss: Do you believe in life after death?
Employee: No, because there is no proof of it.
Boss: Well there is now !
Employee: How?
Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left

Anime

What can a goose do that a duck can't, but a lawyer should? Shove its bill up its ass!

Anonymous

If an accountant's spouse cannot sleep, what is the best cure? Ask the accountant to talk about their work.

UncleJB

Why can't designated hitters bake pancakes? They also forget the batter.

Repor9

Do you know what happens if you piss of a pilot? He takes off.

andres

How can you tell when an engineer is an extrovert. He stares at YOUR shoes while he talks to you.

dustinc

Why are proctologists so gloomy? They always have the end in sight.

rrivas137

We've been reading in the papers lately about terrible cruelty someone is causing to our winged friends by the shore, as many Pelicans have been found with their beaks cut off. Police suspect a local bill collector is behind it all.

MLG1