joke bank - Political Jokes

What did Clinton say when asked if he had used protection? "Sure, there was a guard standing right outside the door."

A priest, a politician, and a clown, walk into the bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"

Have you heard about the Osama Bin Laden celebratory drink? It's two shots and a splash of water!

How did we know that Monica would testify? Because she has a history of not being able to keep her mouth closed.

Why are there no K-Marts in Syria?
Cause there are targets everywhere!

Q: Why does the queen carry a scepter?
A: Because everyone works 'cept her.

The state dinner at the White House honored the prime minister of India, and the menu was vegetarian. How do you like that for Thanksgiving? No turkey, wrong Indians.

Rush Limbaugh wanted to buy an NFL team. His spectacle for him to see black people hit each other while the white quarterback is being protected. Reminds him of the America he loves.

I went into a Liberal clothing store today to purchase some pants. When I started trying on a few pairs, I noticed that all the pockets except one were visibly removed. I stopped a clerk and ask him if anyone complained. He said "No, Liberals always want a hand out." I asked what happened to the other pockets. "They don't go to waste: Conservatives use them to line theirs."

Why did the Pakistani cross the road? Because the American government was subsidizing the construction of mango harvesting and preservation infrastructure in the region on the other side, allowing farmers with the necessary means to develop strong ties to American markets and earn significant profits.

Q: What did Saddam Hussein and Little Miss Muffit have in common?
A: They both had curds (Kurds) in their way (whey).

Women in Washington DC were asked if they would have sex with the President. 86% of those responding said, ''Not again.''