Yo mama so ugly the Terminator said, "I won't be back."
Q: Do you know who was the first black guy to admit he is the father?
A: Darth Vader.
I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta, now it’s a Ford Focus.
Yo mamma is so old she knew Burger King when he was a prince.
Q: What's the difference between Tom Cruise and a tuxedo?
A: One comes out of the closet on special occasions and the other is a tuxedo.