Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"
Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."
Roses are red.
Your blood is too.
You look like a monkey
And belong in a zoo.
Do not worry,
I'll be there too.
Not in the cage,
But laughing at you.
Yo momma is so hairy, when she went to the movie theater to see Star Wars, everybody screamed and said, "IT'S CHEWBACCA!"