What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
It gets toad away.
Yo momma is so stupid she brought a spoon to the super bowl.
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
How do you blindfold a Chinese person? Put floss over their eyes.
Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"
Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."