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joke bank - School Jokes

Teacher: "Jill, where is the America on the map?"
Jill: "Right there, ma'am."
Teacher: "Correct. Now, Jack, tell me who found America."
Jack: "Jill."

HARSHANGI

One day at school, little Jimmy needed to go to the restroom so he raised his hand. The strict substitute teacher asked him to say the full alphabet before she would let him go. "But Miss, I am bursting to go," said Jimmy. "You may go, but after you say the full alphabet." "A-B-C-D-E-F-G-H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-Q-R-S-T-U-V-W-X-Y-Z," he said. Catching his mistake, the substitute asked, "Jimmy, where is the 'P?'" He answered, "Halfway down my legs, Miss."

Anonymous

Q: What is white when it's dirty and black when it's clean?
A: A chalkboard.

Berry

Teacher: "What is the future tense of the statement: 'I had killed a thief'?"
Student: "You will go to jail."

Anonymous

Q: What do elves learn in school?
A: The Elfabet.

Anonymous

An English teacher told his students that when pronouncing a word beginning with the letter "H" they should ignore the "H" as in hour, honor, and honest. That day when leaving for class, he left a note for his assistant, "Please heat my rice for me." When the teacher returned to his office, he met an empty bowl. He asked the assistant, "Where is my food?" The assistant replied, "You said I should heat the rice for you, but you also instructed us to ignored the 'H.'"

DjTizo Gh

If number two pencils are so popular why are they still number two?

Sarah

If number two pencils are so popular why are they still number two?

Sarah

It was the first day of school. Harry's mother went into his bedroom and said, "Come on Harry, get up now. You have to go to school today."
"But I don't want to go to school," replied Harry, "I want to stay in bed. Why do I have to go to school"?
"Because," answered his mother, "you're a teacher!"

sanaz

Teacher: "Where was the Constitution of India signed?"
Student: "At the bottom of the page!"

sweety

Teacher: "Where was the Constitution of India signed?"
Student: "At the bottom of the page!"

sweety

Teacher: Will any idiot in the room stand up please?
(a student stands up)
Teacher: Why do you think you are an idiot? Student: actually I don't, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself.

Anonymous