Sign up for the Laugh Factory newsletter to receive show announcements, presale codes, and special offers!
My husband told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down...
Yo momma so broke, she was walking down the road with one shoe. Someone asked if she lost one. She said, "No, I found one!"
Why do dolphins seek attention on the internet? Because they're doing it for clicks!
What is a kidnapper's favorite shoes? White vans...
Why don't koalas count as actual bears? Because they don't meet koala-fications!
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop!
Why was the fish failing in class?? Because it was below sea level...
A roman walks into a cafe holds up 2 fingers and gets 5 coffees.
Never confide in a vacuum cleaner. They're always collecting dirt
Why does snoop Dogg use an umbrella? Fo-Drizzle.
What do you call a nose with no body? No body nose
Why should you never play poker at the zoo? Too many cheetahs
Have you heard the joke about yoga. Nevermind it's a bit of a stretch.
My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban at the zoo.
President Lincoln was approached by a woman after a political speech… If you were my husband I would poison your tea. Lincoln replied...if you are my wife I'll gladly drink it.
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
Q: What time is it when the clock strikes 13? A: Time to get a new clock.
What do you call a guy who's really loud? Mike.
3 unwritten rules of life . 1) 2) 3)
Q: What does a cloud wear under his raincoat? A: Thunderwear.
Yo momma so dumb, she tried to surf the microwave
Me: Would you like to be the sun in my life? Her: Awww... Yes!!! Me: Good then stay 92.96 million miles away from me
Teacher: How much is a gram? Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need