joke bank - Sports Jokes

Q: How did the blonde fisherman die?
A: He was run over by the Zamboni.


Q: Why does Dwayne Wade wear number 3?
A: Because that's the amount of minutes he can stay on the court without getting hurt.


Three football teams (Arsnel, Liverpool, and Hartsfield) are flying from England across Egypt for a match in the Middle East. Their plane crashes in the desert and they survive. After days of wandering, they are really hungry so when they come across a camel, the footballers decide to kill it and eat it. The Liverpool team says, "Because we play for Liverpool, will we eat the liver." The Hartsfield players decide, "Because we play for Hartsfield, we will eat the heart." Arsnel says, "I think we might go hungry..."

UK Bloke

What do hookers and the Dolphins have in common? They both have hundreds of balls pounded into their endzone every week.


Q: What do the Buffalo Sabres and the Titanic have in common?
A: They're both at the bottom of the Atlantic.

Hockey any...

Q: Which sport is always in trouble? A: BADminton.


Two elderly sisters donated $5 to a charity and, to their surprise, won tickets to a football game. Since they had never seen a live football game before, Madge thought the free tickets would provide an excellent opportunity for doing so. "I think so, too," said Mabel. "Let's go!" They soon found themselves high in a noisy stadium overlooking a large, grassy expanse. They watched the kickoff and the seemingly endless back-and-forth struggles that comprised the scoreless first half. They enjoyed the band music and cheerleader performance that followed. Then came the second half. When the teams lined up for the second-half kickoff, Madge nudged her sister. "I guess we can go home now, Mabel," she said. "This is where we came in."


Three doctors are out geese-hunting. A gaggle flies over and the oncologist raises and then lowers his gun. "I better conduct an MRI first to determine if those were really geese." Some more geese fly by & the endocrinologist raises his gun and then lowers it. "I'll need some bloodwork to conduct an A1C and determine what those birds were first." Some more geese fly over. The trauma doc raises his shotgun and blows them out of the sky. "What were those things, anyway?" he asks.

Jean Bustos

Q: What did March say to the madness? A: "What's all that bracket?"


Q: What do Bill Buckner and Micheal Jackson have in common?
A: They both wear a glove on one hand for no apparent reason.

The man

How do you flick off a Green Bay Packer fan? Hold four fingers up!


Q: How many UNC fans does it take to change a tire? A: Four: three to tap the keg and one to call daddy.

Leonard Wa...